“HOOB!” “HOOB!” “HOOB!”

September 28, 2010

Hello.

Every single time I log into WordPress (which WordPress doesn’t think is a word), it asks me if I want it to remember my password (so all the other seven people who live with me can mess with my account, of course). Every single time this happens, I press the same button:

[never for this site]

But it always pops up every time I log in. Yeah, that’s annoying. Who would be so lazy that they can’t even type in their password. What is the point of your computer ‘remembering’ your password, anyways?

I think the kids of the future will be very lazy. This is what the future will look like:

The earth will be covered in jell-o. Everyone will live in underwater bases in space. All shoes will be Velcro and nobody will know how to tie shoes anymore. That is the dark future that awaits us.

I opened the internet today and half the screen was covered in tool-bars that my brothers had downloaded. I couldn’t delete them all at once, so I had to delete them one at a time. Once of them even made me do a survey about why I chose to delete it. And for some reason, every time I open the internet, my homepage is the yahoo! search engine instead of google. I like google, not yahoo!. …And as if to taunt me, there is a button below the Yahoo! sign asking if you want to make it your home page, even though it already is.

…Speaking of idiocy, I did something rather stupid myself yesterday. I am in need of new shoes. Badly. I am a loyal Converse wearer (but am not limited to, of course), and my current pair had walked it’s course. I went to the Navy Exchange with my dad to buy another pair. I am size nine. I found a size nine. Now I buy it, right? Wrong. I put it back on the shelf, grab one that has never been tired on before from the back row, then buy that one. I got the wrong size though. The end.

On the way back to our house, I saw an obese lady with a grey shirt that said “PINK” on the back. Hasn’t she ever played with crayons?

A lot of times I notice people trying to be unique and ‘random’. One way people try to be ‘different’ is making blogs. Those people are annoying. It’s so ironic to watch all the people, uniform in their uniqueness.

…The people in the next room are watching football. Want to hear a quote from them? Here it is:

“OH YEAH! ……OH YEAH! HOOB! HOOB! HOOB! BEHOJOOOWEGU!!! …barfackle…amazing….barfackleDOOSH! HE……he jumped right over him! WEGHOWWW BOOG!”

…I am so glad I do not watch sports. I watch Sponge Bob Square Pants instead. It’s even more amazing because people can cry underwater.

I recently read a facebook status:

I THROW MY SKITTLES IN THE AIR SOMETIMES, SAYING AYYYOOO, TASTE THE RAINBOWWW

…It obviously doesn’t make any sense. Only a mental person would throw skittles up in the air instead of eating them. In fact, I would venture to say that the poster has never thrown skittles up in the air while shouting “AYYYOOO, TASTE THE RAINBOWWW” in her life. Just a guess, though.

I find it very annoying when people add extra letters to be ‘cute’.

example: “i luvv u…wna b marrriedd…on facebookk? i cn give u a virtual ringg…onlinee!<3”

Want to hear a story? What? You don’t? Well I will put it in italics to make it more exciting for you.

There once was a flea. His name was Mr. Flea. One day, a farmer named Mr. Farmer came to where Mr. Flea was. The farmer went to sleep on the ground. “I think I will infest this farmer!” thought Mr. Flea with glee.

…But when he jumped onto the farmer’s head, he was kicked out by another group of fleas that had already claimed that head. Mr. Flea walked off sadly. As he was walking away, the farmer got up. “Gee,” he said to himself. “…I really feel like rubbing fire corn on my head.”

He seemed to hear a small voice coming from inside his hair that yelled “No!”, “No!”, but he did it anyway. His hair was immediately set on fire and all the fleas on his head died.

“Wow, I’m glad I was kicked out of that hair before the farmer rubbed fire corn on his head!” thought the now happy flea.

But just then, a circus man came up to him and put him in a tent with a lot of fleas in it. They were all doing tricks.

For twenty years, the fleas trained hard for their first and only performance. When it finally came, the circus man looked inside the small , portable tent that they were in. “Well, my friends…this is the big day. If you succeed, I will win great prizes and I can finally feed my family!” he said with a smile.

Millions of people gathered for the performance. Mr. Flea had the first act, which was jumping through a hoop of fire. He tripped, and set the tent on fire, which set the fleas in the tent on fire. The fleas that were on fire jumped onto the circus man’s head, causing him to catch on fire. He ran into the crowd and soon everyone’s head was on fire. Then the tent was on fire. Then the circus man’s family had no food.

~The End~

The moral of this story? Well there are  two.

Number one is to not be a flea.

Number two is to not try to jump through rings of fire if you are a flea.

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2 Responses to ““HOOB!” “HOOB!” “HOOB!””

  1. CJ said

    WOW this is medicine to the soul! I love how….sporadic you are.

    K-k-k-k-keep it UP!

  2. CJ, I have to agree with you here. Oh the irony!!! This is classic!

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